This morning a song came on my iPod as I stepped off the B train at Rockefeller Center. As it played, I walked slowly through the station towards the exit. I nearly began to cry. I’m almost embarrassed to say what song it was, but I’ll suck it up. It was “Everybody Hurts” by R.E.M.
I’m not, nor was I ever, the biggest fan of R.E.M. - I never really got into them when they were big, and even having listened to much of their music in recent years, I remain more or less disinterested. Yes, I appreciate and enjoy a couple of their tunes, and I can see why they became so popular, but I missed that boat, apparently.
This morning, though, “Everybody Hurts” started to play and something turned on inside my head. That song has always reminded me of something. Of another song, another age - something. It has one of those melodies, that timeless alternating I-IV chord progressions - it feels familiar, even it you’ve never heard it before. I remember learning relatively recently that it was an R.E.M. song and being legitimately surprised it hadn’t been released 30 years earlier.
Change to present tense:
So it’s playing this morning and everything comes sharply into focus. All outside noise disappears and I just see people. They all look the same. There is no such thing as age. Race. Gender. Class. Religion. It’s clear to me in this moment how much we share, how deep the connection runs. How much pain we all feel. How alone we all are. Each one of us, walking in this world, feels isolated. A societal focus on individuality separating us in our minds from the vast interdependent organism that is Humanity.
In this moment of intense stillness and quiet, I have an incredible sense that the hurt and loss and loneliness we feel is somehow good, somehow right. That it is one of the many things that connect us as human beings, one of the multitude of ways in which we are never - can never be - truly alone. That it is the imperfections and inconsistencies that make life perfect.
That no other day could possibly exist. I smile.
25 April 2007
No Other Day Could Possibly Exist
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4 comments:
Weird, I had a moment like that last night too.
I had been out with a girlfriend and of course we were talking a lot about wedding plans and stuff (she was married last summer) and on the way home I was thinking about how I always thought I never wanted to get married. Because that's what EVERYONE ELSE does. I didn't want a family, I wanted to be independent! I wanted to be totally free of obligations to anyone! I didn't want to be like EVERYONE ELSE!
But other people do it because it makes them happy, and at some point (well after adolescence) I realized, it would make me happy too.
Because I'm human too.
And none of us are well and truly "independent." Because none of us are truly alone.
And yeah, "Everybody Hurts" is one of those songs that feels so familiar. Like they pulled some anthem from the collective unconscious. Crying at that song is so not embarrassing.
Of course the hurt and loss and loneliness is a good thing, because if there wasn't any, how would we know what happiness and love and togetherness are? It's all beautiful.
I think a lot of people are reluctant to write things like this that are actually deep and thoughtful, for fear of being dismissed as "corny" or "emo" or whatever. But the fragmented, individualistic internets needs more of it. You have made another fantastic post, sir.
"It's all beautiful" - yes.
Wow .... just wow.
I know the feeling, have felt it many times.
Love your stuff by the by
Here's to your insightful look at humanity. *lifts my Mountain Dew can*
It makes one line from the Torah really shine in my head right now: "Treat your neighbor as yourself".
If we'd only remember that our fellow man/woman has had a life full of both blessings and tragedies (that which you so insightfully saw etched on their faces) we could possibly stop thinking of ourselves for a change and think of others.
As I bid for a brief sleep, I pray for you and furthermore all of humanity.
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